I don’t care how you slice it or how you dish it out, abuse is abuse. Weather mental, physically, verbal or psychological it’s all the same, sometimes psychological is worse than physical, because it stays with you even in your sleep. Why is it of Human nature to attack the weakest, wounded and most volnuable, in the same way a Lion would encountering a wounded prey ripping into its very Heart and Soul. Human Preditors attack the ones closest to them ripping into the fibers of their being. It tears your soul apart with the hate for their trespassing on you. Joe and Tracy were both Teenage friends of mine, growing up they found each other through our inner circle, got married right out of High School. Didn’t take them long to start a family, within two years they were blessed with two beautiful children. Joe was a good provider and Father, also a one Woman Man, he had only one extra curricula activity. Since High School he had a passion for Karate, he was a natural he advanced to Black Belt easily.
Being a Black Belt his Arms and Legs were subjected to the same rules of Law as a Prize Fighter. A stupid law if you asked me, that means if someone had it in for you and knew your limitations, they could beat you to a pulp and all you could do is cower. Tracy took advantage of the Law, whenever there were any disagreement or exchange of words she would beat this Man in front of the Children with whatever she could get her hands on. The damage caried double indemnity, to his pride and the Children’s shaping of a Father Figure. I can only express my utmost disgust for people who can only express themselves through rage. Tracy would pounce on joe with the fierceness of a Jungle Cat, many times I would see him black and blue, knowing that he was a Black Belt left me confused. My curiosity burrowed into his private life, he confide in me that one day Tracy is going to kill him. Once she got so mad she shoved with such force into the Sheetrock wall he landed in the next door Apartment. I asked him how could he stayed there and take it, he answered I love my Kids.
I have always known that there was something wrong with Tracy over the years. Her demeanor said she may have been abused,she had always projected repressed anger. Never the less many people who were abused overcome, shed their scabs and moved on and leave tragic beginnings behind, as I did. It appears to me Tracy had nurtured whatever Demons that manifested themselves from weather abuse, neglect or molestation, never the less she was someone in need of Psychiatric help, and Joe in need of Refuge. His reluctance to abandon this Marriage from Hell is a common situation in Society where enemies stay together for the Kids sake. The Kids will survive you won’t, the Bible says if your right hand offend you, cut it off.
When I was ten years old I lived next door to a Man who came home every day from work, after stopping at the Bar beat his Wife in the yard and in the House with no Curtains. All this taking on in front of me a curious male child soaking up everything to be learned in life. God has been good to me that I did not absorb that trait,thinking that it was a natural thing to beat your Woman. One thing I learned from that situation is that ninety nine percent of women beaters, are sniveling cowards who only attack the easiest and weakest victims, and would never walked in a Bar and start a fight with the littlest guy in there. Like I have said cowardly Jackals.
Later on in life I met a sixteen years old Boy, who was withdrawn and locked in a Room of mental torture. In a Room of fifty he was alone with his Nemesis. Story told when he was fifteen he killed his Stepfather, stabbing him twenty times. He flipped out after years of watching his Stepfather giving his Mother many horrendous beatings. When I looked in this Boys eyes I see myself in the same Position, if the shoes were on my feet. I have been blessed to be shielded from similar circumstances, where I would have reacted likewise. I guess I will be a Mommas Boy till the day I die. Jim Morrison puts it best ” when the music is over turn out the Lights”. No one should stay and take abuse under no circumstances. I don’t care if I have to live in the Street, but I am gone. Jackals should not go unpunished, if you see abuse and the victims won’t tell, someone should. Forget about the friendship, forget about minding your own business, do tell, because we are our Brothers keeper.