Parenting is not a task taken on haphazardly. Poor parenting poses future problems for your kids, and society as a whole. Your greatest challenge is to prepare your child for the challenges of adulthood. Before they get there they need to know such things like responsibility, good decision making skills, and most of all relationships in all it’s endeavors. I recently read a story about a teenager, who wanted to borrow the family car to go to the biggest bash of the year. The car was not available, so he chose not to go, not out of dejectedness but of good decision making skills. He had observed the person he could have gotten a ride from, at other parties getting drunk and getting behind the wheel. On that faithful day five of his friends chose to ride with a drunk. At speed above eighty he ran off the road killing all. He is alive today because of one solid decision. It’s a good feeling to have all that life affords you, and never needing anything in life. It’s another thing when you spoil kids rotten, giving them every thing they ask for. The trick is to be generous while teaching self fulfillment, self gratification and independence. The objective is to know that if you died prematurely, they could fend for themselves.” Momma may have, Poppa may have, but God bless the child that’s got his own”.
I once met a man who was worth five hundred million dollars in nineteen seventy seven. He is probably worth three times multiplied today. I wish I could print his name because he deserve honorable mention. He was one of the humblest most down to earth person I have ever met in my lifetime. I did not have the education and wealth he possessed, but he treated me as an equal. My Cousin was a Seamstress who designed and fabricated his shirts and overcoats. While waiting to be fitted we sat in the living room, he conversed with me like we were of the same cut. Most people with a fraction of his wealth and education, you have to pull their heads from their intestine to see their face. They look down on less fortunate as inferiors, not worthy of their time of day. That is where upbringing comes in, If you were never taught humanity and humility your upbringing was flawed. Thinking that it doesn’t stink and that you are special are flaws of relationships. My Mother taught us that if they had to go to the bathroom and put their pants on one leg at a time as you did they were no better than you, only more fortunate and better educated.
This wealthy friend of mine, and I say friend not because he befriended me and had great conversations, but he had me fitted with a coat I could never afford as a token, something to remember the encounter. He was the salt of the Earth, telling me that when his two sons graduated College. Instead of giving them cushy jobs in his organization, he started them at the bottom. Giving the boys jobs as laborers on the road Construction end of the company. I said to him that sounds cruel and unjust for college educated people, he responded ” to teach them the value of a dollar”. That blew me away, I was twenty one years old. That was like going to College and completing a four years economics course in one hour. That was parenting in its highest form, he was not about to make them Rock Star rich and irresponsible.
My friend Jenifer was the total opposite, she was handed everything in life. At seventeen she was given a brand new Cadillac, at twenty one she married a Millionaire. She was taught to worship money, my Mother taught us to never say your prayers to the almighty Dollar. Jenifer was taught the opposite. The man she married was a Pig, he would go to Vegas and drop a lot of money. Being a sore looser he would come home and take it out on her. He would give her horrific beatings, breaking bones and all. She stayed and took the brutalization for the security of the almighty Dollar. ” Be careful of what you ask for in life you just might get it”. The Children were horrified by the environment, the walls have ears, their personality projected their mother’s inundated existence. How cruel of this Mother to subject her Children to this abuse, all in the name of having money. She is failing her children, the same way her parents failed her teaching that the end justifies the means.